....  You'll live to beeighty.

 

 Patient: But, doctor, I am 80 right now.

 

 Doctor: See, what did I tell you.

 

 I can't remember anything!

 

 Patient: Doctor, I have a serious memoryproblem.

 

 I can't remember anything!

 

 Doctor: So, since when did you have thisproblem?

 

 Patient: What problem?

 

 Call me an ambulance!

 

 A man, after being hurt, calls 911 for help.

 

 Man: Operator, operator, call me an ambulance!

 

 Operator: Okay, sir, you're an ambulance!

 

 What do you do for a living?

 

 A guy walks into the doctor's office and says, "Doc, I haven't had a bowel movement in a week!"

 

The doctor gives him a prescription for a mildlaxative and tells him, "If it doesn't work, let meknow."

 

 A week later the guy is back: "Doc, still nomovement!"

 

 The doctor says, "Hmm, guess you needsomething stronger," and prescribes a powerfullaxative.

 

 Still another week later the poor guy is back: "Doc,STILL nothing!"

 

 The doctor, worried, says, "We'd better get somemore information about you to try to figure outwhat's going on.

 

 What do you do for a living?"

 

 "I'm a musician."

 

 The doctor looks up and says, "Well, that's it!

 

Here's $10.00.

 

 Go get something to eat!"